Billy Bowden.

Mrs. Jones yelled, “You’ve gone too far!
“My boots, my pearls, why, even my mink!
“Not to mention my nail varnish- Cutex Coral Pink!”

“I’ve had it up till here with you, young man,
“First it was the highlights, then the fake tan,
“I tolerated this and more, but you’ve crossed the line.
“I hereby disown you; you’re no son of mine!”

“Out of my house with your bags and things,
“Your tight trousers and those outrageous wigs.
“March your made-up behind right out of that door,
“And make sure I never hear of you anymore!”

Billy walked out the door, carrying his LV tote,
Clicking his Prada heels, swishing that Chanel coat.
Ignoring the jeers of passers-by,
He glided right out of his old, stale life.

He changed his name to Anastasia the Great,
Grew his hair, lost some weight.
Found an apartment and made lots of new friends,
He knew that fame was just around the bend.

One day he met an upcoming designer
They clicked instantly, Billy didn’t know anyone kinder!
Curvaceous Claude (for that was his amore’s name)
Brought our Billy wealth, adoration and fame.

The fashion weeks, the parties, and the parties after that,
Being gifted a watch, a phone, a hat…
The pleasures of hobnobbing with the snooty
Air-kissing, drinking champagne out of a little flutey!

Ah! This was the life for Anastasia a.k.a Billy,
People loved him for who he was, they didn’t call him silly.
They didn’t laugh at him, or cringe in disgust,
They were completely oblivious to his past.

He went on to become a gay icon for many,
Balanced fame and responsibility quite admirably.
He spent many years inspiring people, and bringing laughter,
And with his Curvaceous Claude, he lived happily ever after.

P.s.: This is my personal homage to a film called “Breakfast on Pluto”, and the search for the Phantom Lady.


~ by cranialrumblings on February 1, 2009.

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